For busy moms wondering how they can make time for themselves, I have the answer for you right here:
Set your alarm for 5 a.m.
Wake up.
Inhale.
Now, exhale and truly appreciate the silence before things start to get real.
Before the coffee brews, your kids pitter patter, and the Zooms, wake up early and take five to 10 minutes (at minimum) to get yourself together through meditation.
What is meditation? I like this definition from Headspace, a meditation and sleep app:
“Meditation isn’t about becoming a different person, a new person, or even a better person. It’s about training in awareness and getting a healthy sense of perspective. You’re not trying to turn off your thoughts or feelings. You’re learning to observe them without judgment. And eventually, you may start to better understand them as well.”
A meditation routine creates discipline. And discipline rewards us with a sense of calmness, direction, and purpose.
The aim of a guided meditation isn’t to clear your thoughts—it’s to build the mental habit of identifying the moment when your thoughts stray. It’s about being present and witnessing your thoughts and feelings as they come and go.
Meditating has been a life-altering practice for me. I discovered it in 2018 after a phone call with a mom friend. Our 3 year olds went to school together, and she had just had a new baby.
“I don’t have time to think, create, produce. It seems there isn’t enough time during the day,” I told her. “I feel like I’m losing myself.” I felt like my dreams would slip away from me if I did not find a solution in managing my role as a mother and entrepreneur—and it scared me.
“Well, Tori,” my friend said casually, “I’ve been getting up at 5 a.m. to practice this thing called Miracle Morning. It’s given me more time in the day. By 8 o’clock, I have poured into myself, I have sent emails, and I feel really good by the time I start my day.”
Now, I’m competitive by nature: I couldn’t let this mom of two (with a newborn!) get one over on me, when I just have one child. I immediately ordered the book, got my mind right about waking up at 5, and I haven’t looked back since.
Getting up early to pour into myself before my family rises was the one thing that allowed me to reconnect with myself and purpose. In order to feel intentional, organized, and proud of myself, I had to learn how to make the same 24 hours available to all of us count.
Now, I know waking up early is a huge request that cuts into the limited sleep you’re probably already getting. But, I promise you it’s a great starting point to transform your new normal during these stressful times.
Why?
1. Meditation gets your mind right.
Morning meditation is a good way to charge your mind. You’re going to need every bit of your energy and mental acuity to make it through the day’s work, virtual schooling, and play schedules.
A meditation routine creates discipline. And discipline rewards us with a sense of calmness, direction, and purpose.
2. Meditation can serve as a springboard for new ideas and possibilities.
In the past, I’ve looked to others to help me make decisions. It wasn’t because I couldn’t think for myself—I just didn’t have the tools to know that I could go within and tap into my own truth and power. I didn’t know how and I didn’t trust myself enough.
It wasn’t until after I started my morning meditation routine that I realized my own innate power. After a practice, I’d get overwhelmed with so many ideas or “downloads” while driving my daughter to school, that I had to record them as quickly as they came! If I waited I would miss them all!
These new ideas made me want to stay consistent because I got so many directives that I acted on immediately. Impressing my desires upon the subconscious mind during meditation attracts what I have declared yes to.
Once you start meditating and being intentional about your desires, you will suddenly begin to see people, events, circumstances, and signs that support and align with your vision.
3. Meditation is an opportunity to observe yourself.
“Our mental energy is sapped by an endless stream of useless, unhelpful thoughts and opinions,” says Mark Manson, the author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.
Meditation is an opportunity to dam up that stream. A yogi friend shared this statement with me: “Prayer is when you ask God. Meditation is when you listen.”
Observing and being aware of your own thoughts puts YOU in the driver’s seat. It offers the opportunity to replace and remove old ideas and opinions that keep you frustrated and stuck with new ones that move you forward.
4. Meditation helps you confront your fears.
Are you operating in fear?
Fear has a purpose and is a valuable emotion. Fear keeps us safe and away from danger. Yet, fear has no place in our creative processes.
Morning meditation offers a sense of calm and trust as you decide to step into the unknown. The feeling of fear will absolutely be present. But this time, because of your level of awareness, you know and expect this and know that it doesn’t have to stop you from walking into your greatness.
‘Prayer is when you ask God. Meditation is when you listen.’
Two months after graduating high school, I was in a horrible car accident: A friend who was in the car with us passed away. I have scars on my body and a metal rod in my right leg because I broke my femur in half. I had to learn how to walk, cross my legs, and, the most challenging, trust life again.
After having my daughter, the thought of something like this, or worse, happening to her shook me to the core. I refused to let these thoughts take over my mind. I created an inspirational playlist and in my meditation, I imprinted the vision of me actually being with her in the hospital as she gives birth to my first grandchild. I had to. I had to replace the negative thoughts with a positive visual. And it helped me confront that core-shaking fear and be present with my daughter.
5. Meditation regulates your nervous system.
Meditation reduces the inflammation response caused by stress. According to NewScientist, “Inflammation is the body’s first line of defense against infection and injury, but it can damage the body if switched on long term.” (That’s why stress is so bad for your health.)
Early last year, February 3 to be exact, I experienced the worst sciatica pain ever. The pain was a level 10 and had me in tears. I was going to doctors and chiropractors to hopefully end the pain, and learned it was caused by inflammation. One of my doctors suggested turmeric, which is known to bring down inflammation.
While taking prescribed meds and tumeric, and still in some level of pain, I stayed true to my morning meditations. I needed and wanted to stay consistent and trust the process. However, this time I added a visual of healing light radiating throughout my body, particularly where I was feeling the most pain. It didn’t happen overnight, but eventually the pain went away altogether.
Now that you see the benefits of meditation, give it a try. There’s no “right” or “wrong” way to meditate. Take as little or long as you need before motherhood really begins.
At some point in this journey, you may find yourself resistant to carving out enough time to meditate. It’s OK. Getting into this routine takes time and consistent practice. Aim for 21 days in a row, which is the amount of time it takes to create a habit. If you’re interested in getting support with shifting your mindset, join my 21-Day Mindset Reboot Challenge.
Stay consistent, and see what happens. Meditation’s magic starts with you.
Hear Tori talk more about making time for you in the video below.
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